i once had some hard drugs. in a hospital. from the anaesthetist. ok, so they weren't 'hard drugs' as in class A, or even B for that matter. these were the enshrined type that the government approves of .. mainly because the person pushing it works for them, i would cynically suggest.
cutting them some slack, i did have a broken leg at the time and the so called hard drugs did at least stop it hurting whilst the casualty staff started pulling it this way and that to get it into this splint thingy.
the lady anaesthetist administered this hit via a gas canister. putting a mask over my face i was instructed to breath. 'you won't feel a thing' she promised, and i was only too eager to believe her. a few seconds later, i was nonplussed. I felt fine, I didn't feel anything. I could have easily driven home, and walksz in a straittttttt linez offisserrrrrrrr.... ok so the thing had started to take belated effect, revealing me as an impatient £"$£ even when mortally wounded.
then i was looking at a television in a very dark room. the tv was quite far away and i remember thinking that it really was a bit daft to put the seat this far back because you couldn't really see what was going on. and the sound was too low.
on the tv was a leg with some people fiddling with it, and a lady looking at the camera instructing the viewer to 'keep breathing'. she seemed to be holding something over the camera lense. I realised I was taking deep breaths, as though i was obeying the tv show, and thought it was a pretty daft thing to do. So I held my breath for a while to prove to the tv (of all things) that I was in charge around here.
Back on the tv, the lady looked concerned and repeated her command more insistently. Her stern gaze fell upon me, and my resistance ebbed .. I took another breath; anything for an easy life ;)
By now the leg on the tv had been put in a splint, and the doctors stood back. The lady withdrew from vision and my chair seemed to draw closer to the tv. slowly at first, then a rush .. all of a sudden light. light everywhere. i was in the tv show. people asking me how i felt, the lady moving away with her cylinder of gas.
back in the darkness: the chair sitting empty, the show plays to itself.....
